Moving On...

Okay, so I haven't written on this blog in a while. Unlike the other one, this one is dedicated to my spiritiual journey. I haven't had any reason to write in a while. Infact, I didn't want to write period. I hit a brick wall and I just stopped. I couldn't stand right back up. I don't know if this counts as a testimony...or a personal encounter or whatever. I don't know if there's a lesson for you in all of this. But I truly hope that it does something. What I do know, it's that this is going to take more than one post. So...stay with me till the end okay?

Writing has always been therapeutic for me. It has helped me in the past to move past intense pain. I've even written to the ones that can no longer reply me. This time, ehn! I'm going to try and describe how I felt without being too melodramatic. Have you ever almost drowned? Do you know that burning in your lungs? Then it kinda feels like your heart is beating faster than normal?  There's also the part where you know you're suffocating but you no longer remember how to breath? I'm sorry...am I describing how you think dying might feel? Lol...for a moment I thought I was going to die. I actually felt like dying. But that's just wishful thinking. It's never that easy.

I listened to people tell me over and over again to just move on. To just forget. I wanted to scream at them all, "If it was that easy, do you think I wouldn't have done that?" One thing I got from all of this, is that I am a strong and courageous woman. I never even knew I had that much of God inside of me. I didn't know I had eaten enough of the word for it to speak peace into my storm. In my time of silence, I heard God speak because His word was safely hidden in my heart.

I'm yet to get to the gist of the matter. I guess you're just gonna have to wait for the next post....